Monday, 21 April 2014

Now pay attention, 007...

Sunday, 20 April 2014


The last in what has accidentally become a triumvirate of fake instructions for Bond gadgets is 007's most awesome (and awesomely 90s) phone. 

Seen in 1997's 'Tomorrow Never Dies', Bond's phone was a prototype Ericsson (Ericsson would later create a much less gadget-packed model similar to it). In a touchscreen world it now looks incredibly dated, so I gave it some incredibly dated instructions. Remember when you bought a new phone in the 90s/early 00's and there'd be a tightly-folded canvas of paper featuring the operating guide jammed in the box with it? You'd then have to unfold it and wrestle with it until you found the section with your language on.

You don't get that with phones anymore. What a shame. Don't try and wrestle with the above image. It only comes in Nokia-knock-off Finnish. 

Thursday, 17 April 2014


The Swedish Golden Gun instructions went down well, so I had a stab at another set of foreign retro instructions for technology from the Bond universe. This time: 007's famous Omega Seamaster watch, rendered to look like the instructions of a Japanese toy (I took the design layout from an 80s Transformers box - God the back of Transformer packets were exciting back when I was a kid). 

The watch is an amalgamation of Brosnan's watches from Goldeneye (laser watch), Tomorrow Never Dies (Chinese Secret Service detonator watch), and The World is Not Enough (grapple watch). 

Oh, and don't worry about the Japanese writing - as it's run through Google Translate it's probably gibberish. 

Monday, 14 April 2014

Instruktioner [UPDATED]

Statistically, based on views on the blog and Twitter, the poster for 'The Man With the Golden Gun' was the most popular of the Bond pics I did. So feel free to enjoy the full Ikea-ish instructions for the gilded pistol, which have got a bit tatty since '74.

Friday, 11 April 2014

Bond Poster Project: The Result

Thursday, 10 April 2014

Bond Poster Project: 'Skyfall'

'This is the end. Hold your breath and count to ten'.

No, wait, keep breathing, don't pass out.

The Bond Poster Project comes to a conclusion with the latest movie, 'Skyfall', and a noir-ish theme in blue (like Craig's tux). Bond protects a beautiful lady (take your pick - it was originally meant to be 'M' but I had trouble drawing the silhouette of lovely Dame Judi) as the shadow of Silva looms threateningly over him. And to add to the pulp theme the lyrics from the theme song have been added for extra, corny, dramatic effect.

So that's it. Done. Until the next film. That's the lovely thing about James Bond: he always returns, for Queen, country, and us the audience.

Thank you for following along. I hope you found at least one rectangle of Bond-y colour that you enjoyed looking at. The Bond Poster Project will return...when 007 decides to.

Tomorrow: All the posters together in one lovely image. And it really is lovely.

Wednesday, 9 April 2014

Bond Poster Project: 'The Living Daylights'

Lot of negative space used here to depict the famous Stradivarius cello, but also to give focus to the silhouettes of Bond and Kara (in red to depict her Soviet connection at the beginning of the film).

Tomorrow: It's the final day of the Bond Poster Project and there's only one film left, 'Skyfall!'